Whether it is those who solidly stick to their conservative belief in the defined roles of men and women, or those who make tacky television programs centering around unfortunate teenage transsexuals, gender is constantly on the agenda (if you will forgive the rather awful pun!).
I have been watching the press go wild over the current dispute centering around Caster Semenya and her high testosterone levels, and marvelling at how obsessed people are with being "masculine" and "feminine." People just cannot accept that there are men and women who do not fit into society’s expectation for them. Indeed, feminist groups in South Africa are angry at Semenya's treatment; I watched a woman on BBC News yesterday exclaiming that "a woman's integrity should be respected." Of course, if there is something fishy going on in Semenya's case, the matter changes considerably.
Yet whatever the outcome of the situation, it is clear that peoples' feelings on what a woman should be are still set in stone. Gender is a difficult issue. I have often felt that people place too much emphasis on the difference between men and women and not enough emphasis on the difference between human beings. "He is better at maths than she is, because he is male" would be an example of this. Why cannot people accept that being good at maths is a quality that some men AND some women have, and some men AND some women do not have?
Perhaps I am biased because I've never really felt any pressure to fit into a feminine norm. My mum always jokes that I have a "male brain," to which I always protest because I hate to be labelled. Mum would argue that my "male characteristics" include a loathing of shopping, channel-hopping with the remote control, laziness, not being able to ask directions, not being able to ask shopping assistants for help, not being able to find anything in the fridge, and various other characteristics. However, this is completely ridiculous because those are only a few aspects of my personality, which is as complicated as any other human being's. I wear make-up, I have hair long enough to brush and shampoo seperately, I'm much more creative than I am technical, and I probably speak more words in a day than most women, let alone men. These are very girly characteristics. So... judge at your leisure, but I like to think of myself as 'me' before I think of myself as 'female.'
But I am one person. Aside from certain times in history when gender boundaries were blurred, perhaps most recently the 1970s and 1980s with the popularity of glam-rock, new-wave, electro-pop and glam-punk, it is only the gays, the geeks and the mega-creative who dare to go against society's restrictions.
What REALLY gets on my nerves is when women metaphorically queue-up to make friends with gay men. These women are of the opinion that "every girl needs a gay best friend." This is like "diamonds are a girl’s best friend," or "hair-straighteners are a girl's best friend." In short, the gay friend is yet another commodity, another must-have. People fondly look at gay men who are happy to wear make-up or more flamboyant clothing and say, "It's OK, they're gay, it's fine." Excuse me? So it'snot OK for straight men? The world is so mixed up! I love David Bowie's gender-bending stuff, but I often ask myself whether he would have done it if he hadn't been famous. If you're a pop-star, people see you as an entertainer, almost like a circus-freak who can do what they want when they want, and it's fine because you're famous. I think the answer is that Bowie probably wouldn't have bothered with the make-up if he hadn't been Ziggy Stardust and had his stage-act.
Women, especially, often feel pressurised to look a certain way (as I often bang on about in my blog, I apologise!). It's as though sexuality, money, gender and attractiveness are all tied in together in one 2D-appearance. It must be pretty difficult, trying to give off this is straight, rich, pretty impression for your average girl. And sadly, it makes life harder for those who are not bothered about appearances, because they may be judged to be things that are not true.
I apologise for rambling!
XXX
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