Updates

I looked back on this blog this evening, and realised that it was no longer reflective of the person I have become, or, more accurately, the person I have un-become. I've changed the background, the title, and the description, in the hope of coming closer to the woman that I am. My 'about me' consists of nothing but the labels of which I am sure. Everything else is suspended.

I haven't deleted any of my former posts, even if they embarrass me. They were heartfelt at the time and I still believe in a lot of the things I said.

I'm going to post a few things I've written fairly recently on here, just to try and get the ball rolling again and get back to a position where opinions can flow freely.

As to how I'm doing at the moment: not great. My chronic depression doesn't seem to be leaving me, and concentrating on university work is such a struggle. I've been struggling on and off with self-injury, I can't wake up -- literally cannot -- until I've overslept, and I'm so exhausted that I don't know how I manage to wake up at all. Oh, and I'm still mighty confused about my sexuality. My partner and I don't have sex, because I don't want to. I don't know if this is because I'm completely gay, or because I have no libido because of my depression. I just don't know.

I'm trying to stay positive so I can get to the end of term and give myself the permission to completely relax. I have some exciting things lined up for the holidays, and I'm determined to be able to enjoy them and not have to pull out.

Thank you for reading

J xxx